How to Stop in the Middle of Everything

Getting time to myself sometimes stresses me out.

When my son is napping, I can sometimes hear a ticking clock. This time to myself is limited and valuable, and it can send my mind spinning with all the possibilities: should I prep dinner? wash pump parts? exercise? work on a project? I get hung up on the best way to use the time. I’d usually like to take a nap, but I don’t know if there will actually be enough time for me to get a good nap in for myself, and I know I’ll feel frustrated if I try to fall asleep, then can’t, or fall asleep just before my son wakes up.

New parents suffer a lot of decision fatigue because of the weight of the responsibilities we’ve taken on and the overwhelming sense there’s not enough time to do it all. Something must be prioritized, something might be dropped.

So one practice that helped me was to have a decision already made: I would do constructive rest practice first thing as soon as my son fell asleep. It often makes sense to make healthy habits a routine, so you don’t have to think about them and actively decide, which uses up some of your energy.

I could rest, even without having a nap, and I could calm those racing thoughts, which helped me get to the next moment and the next decision with a little more easiness.

I already knew that constructive rest is an excellent practice to pause, and to release muscular tension in the body. I knew that it was a good way to take care of myself, even though it was hard to put this first. However, I was pleased to find out that it helped me quell the naptime panic! Paradoxically, putting myself first made it easier to then do the things I “had” to do!

Here’s how you can get started in constructive rest, it’s only 8 minutes long - you can totally do this!

All you need are some paperback books and a firm, yet comfortable surface.

Bend both knees so they are pointing toward the ceiling and place your arms where they can rest.

The point is to allow your body to do as little work as possible. Voila: this is constructive rest practice!

Note: if you are currently pregnant, your constructive rest practice will have a different set-up, see here.

Alexander Technique teachers are experts in the “how” of habit change. If you would like support in cultivating positive habits for yourself, please contact me to schedule a lesson!